Category: Quotes

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“It was the Winter, it was Cold” – Montana

I went back to the Big Sky to do some shows for Winter Comedy Social 2013. Special Thanks to Lukas Seely and Wayne Wilcox for the hospitality. If you are a performer, I recommend you work with these guys!

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Big Ass Icicles!!!!
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I don’t know what’s whiter, the snow or the passengers on the flight to Montana
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4:45 AM
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Even the News Anchor is like “F#ck this Sh#t!!”
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Thank GOD for remote start!!!!
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Basking in the Snow
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I try to tell them but these n#ggas ain’t hearing me, Mossberg Pump, I ride shot gun literally.
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Seem like the whole city go against me, Everytime I’m in the street I hear. YAWK! YAWK! YAWK! YAWK!
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This zombie has a great workout plan, to bad it it didn’t work out……is this thing on?
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“Lord Knows”

One thing I love about doing comedy at the Comedy Store LaJolla is that we get to stay at the condo in Pacific Beach. I needed it too because it was cold and rainy in Los Angeles, which for us is 50 degrees F.LOL

The views remind me of that Rick Ross verse
“I fell in love with the pen, started f#cking the ink
The hustle’s an art, I painted what I would think
Still allergic to broke, prescription straight to the paper
Destined for greatness, but got a place in Jamaica
Villa on the water with the wonderful views
Only fat nigga in the sauna with Jews
Went and got a yacht, I’m talkin’ Carnival cruise
And these n#ggas talking like hoes, they mad they not in my shoes” – Lord Knows

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“And I Quote” – Moving Up in the World!!!

“If you’re climbing the ladder of life, you go rung by rung, one step at a time. Don’t look too far up, set your goals high but take one step at a time. Sometimes you don’t think you’re progressing until you step back and see how high you’ve really gone.” –Donny Osmond

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“And I Quote”

“Money is only a tool. It will take you wherever you wish, but it will not replace you as the driver.” –Ayn Rand

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“And I Quote”

“When you arise in the morning, think of what a precious privilege it is to be alive- to breathe, to think, to enjoy, to love-then make that day count!” –Steve Maraboli

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“And I Quote” Hip Hop and Exotic Car Edition

“I got a house on my neck, my Panamera my pet”-Ross
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“I go from 0-60, a couple seconds, she go from sober to tipsy and gettin’ naked” – Fabolous :308 GTS, I love this car.
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“Rollin’ in the Rolls-Royce Corniche: Only the doctors got this, I’m hidin’ from police” -Jay Z
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“Cocaine Seats, All white like I got the whole thing bleached” -Jay Z
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“She giving me head, I’m grabbing a remmy, I just want to Be, like the back of the Bentley” -Meek Mill
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“I’m early to the party but my ‘Rari is the latest” – ASAP Rocky
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“She said, I know he’s a punk though, But you’re in a Nova, And he’s in a Bronco” -Young & Restless
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“And I Quote”

“How would your life be different if…You stopped worrying about things you can’t control and started focusing on the things you can? Let today be the day…You free yourself from fruitless worry, seize the day and take effective action on things you can change.” –Steve Maraboli

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“And I Quote”

“Whatever you are by nature, keep to it; never desert your line of talent. Be what nature intended you for, and you will succeed.”-Sydney Smith